howie’s halfpipe

you would think Scotland wouldn’t be too bad at cricket.

Well they got smashed yesterday by the aussies!
och aye the noo

due to my lack of physical agression I hve cut and pasted the word “punch’ several times below.

So i can vent my current internal frustration.

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch punch

‘music and lyrics’

2 / 7

wife and I just had a work thing at our house, and boss man brought a salad that ,for lack of a better word, was ‘interesting’.

It contained

pineapple, lime, ruby grape fruit, banana

i’m not sure if anyone enjoyed the lime and i sure didnt enjoy the lime or the grapefruit, infact those items accidentally fell out of by bowl and over the balcony in the backyard.

all in good fun though.

but that is 2 work events in 2 days with dodgy food experiences, and they say all bad things come in three’s.

what will tomorrow hold?

today wife and i headed up the blue mountains for a farwell gathering of a work buddy and his family.

It was nice, boy oh boy there was a lot of long speech’s though. we ate food and drank lots of drinks.

then when dessert time came around i was extremelly excited. the speeched where so long that the time between lunch and dessert seemed like i was doing the 40 hour famine. i was starving from some sweet stufff.

i headed straight for the chocolate cake at the end of the table. took a bite and thought to myself “this cakes tastes a bit funny”, i figured it was some cake out of a packet you know the pre made ones in coles or woolies the ones that have so many preservatives in them that they where probably baked befroe we where born.

anyway i took another bite then on inspection of thei funny tasting cake we discovered that it instead of having the dark spounge like charactoristics of a cake, it was infact a piece of icing with green mould in the shape of a cake underneath it.

i didnt eat any more of it, and one of our buddies promptly moved that cake from the end of the table into a more suitable location. the bin.

the end.

oh actually not the end, to remove the taste of the mould cake i washed it down with a cream covered cup cake, mint slice biscuit and a choc chip cookie that tasted like vegimite.

just saw ‘Wild hogs’ with wife.

It was one of those predictable happy ending slap stick kind of movies. the sort of movie you know isnt going to be amazing but you know it will make you laugh a bit and entertain you for a bit over an hour.

You could see a lot of the gags coming a mile off, others a little more sneaky. The plot was pretty thin and after the main dudes got into some trouble the happy engind was pretty lame.

but having said all that i had a good time watching it, ir really was just a bit of harmless hollywood fun.

4 / 7

lesley posted me this card the other day, its a little beauty

this guy is crazy

since i moved to wordpress over a year ago the amount of spam comments on my blog has pretty much gone. Although every few days there will be 3 or 4 spam comments waiting for approval in my moderation folder. Of course i never approve them!

the funny thing is that they are always trying to leave their comment on this post .

its like they are trying to rub it in!

    ‘Dear IT Support:

           Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
           noticed a distinct slow down in the overall performance,
           particularly in the Flower and Jewellery applications, which
           operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

           In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable
           programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and
           then installed undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0,
            Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0.

           Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system.
           I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no
           avail. What can I do?

           Signed, Desperate ——————

           Dear Desperate:

           First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package,
           while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

           Try entering the command: C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download
           Tears 6.2, which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If
           that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
           automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers
           3.5.

           But remember, overuse of the above application can cause
           Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0,
           or Beer 6.1.

           WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create
           Snoring Loudly.

           CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is
           not a supported application and will crash Husband 1.0.

           In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
           limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You
           might consider buying additional software to improve memory and
           performance. I personally would recommend Hot Food 3.0 and
           Lingerie 7.7.’

           Good Luck, IT Support ——————

           ’Dear IT Support,

           18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates
           4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However,
           there are apparently conflicts between these two products and
           the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the
           sound turned off.

           To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with
           several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football
           4.5, and Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved
           no better.

           I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs
           and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down
           completely for several weeks.

           Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at
           the same time, only to discover that when these two systems
           detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

           I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that
           this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While
           Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does
           come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.

           Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0
           could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made
           were automatically stored in Wife 1.0’s memory and could not be
           deleted.

           They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about
           them.

           Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail
           filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and
           Multi-Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I
           have to try to guess what the problem is.

           Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
           requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle
           Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also,
           when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT Convertible hard
           drive, it often crashes.

           Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called
           MotherInLaw, which can’t be turned off.

           Recently I’ve been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there
           could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact
           that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all
           of your Money before uninstalling itself’.

I really cant think of anything interesting to blog about.

conservapedia has now updated their entry for ‘Jesus’ to something a little more conservative.

Its 7:14 pm and i’m at the office for a 7pm meeting.

We now have comfirmation that no other people will be attending the meeting.

home time.

There is an Ad on tv tht i just saw.

there is a little boy sitting on the toilet doing a poo, he is a bit overcome by the smell of his dump, he then realises that the air freshener is out of juice!

Oh no, he calls to his mum and slips a note under the toilet door telling her there is no air freshener.

then the footage cuts to a picture of the product then the next thing you know the mum is in the bathroom changing the air freshener while the boy is still on the dunny!

Appalling, poor kid, its bad enough that he has to sit in his own smell but then for Mum to walk in and change the air freshener that just wrong! Invasion of privacy.

there is an article on smh about a bunch of American Christians who are angry at wikipedia and have made theor own version called conservapedia.

below is what conservapedia comes up with if you search ‘Jesus’

The name Jesus is simply the name “Joshua” translated first into Greek, then English. In Christian discourse, the name Jesus almost always refers specifically to Jesus of Nazareth, believed by Christian followers to be God’s dad, who came to earth as a human c 2 AD. However, God has recently revealed on His blog that Jesus is actually His nephew, not His son. ^[1] The life of Jesus is recorded in the Bible in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. According to the Gospels, Jesus died on the cross for our sins, and three days later he rose from the dead. The first time John saw Jesus, he said, “Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world!”

I saw ‘the good shepherd’ on tuesday ani forgot to blog about it.

Well it was damn long, bit over two and a half hours. It was good i enjoyed it, but at the same time i found it quite confusing, it jumped around a bit but also i dont know much at all about american political history so it was a bit confusing.

I’ll give it 4 / 7

then tonight was

‘man of the year’

I really enjoyed this film, it was funny, sometimes robin williams is a bit much, he has what i like to call the “jim carey, jack black sydrome’

sometimes hes too over the top that it becomes painful, but not in this move, he was really good. and the good thing is that the trailer didnt really ginve the plot away.

I’m gonna give it 5 / 7

for the first time i got ’singstar’ today!

it was playing singstar rocks, singing ‘these days’ by powderfinger.

oh yeah i’m pretty damn good!

time to divulge

Every friday at wrok we go and do some stuff in a local high school.

We often go hang out in the staff common room first, and some weeks there is lots of food all layed out from staff meetings and visits from dignitries and the like. Anyway today was one of those days, so much cake and biscuits.

I ate a lot of cake, they had this nice chocolate mud cake.mmmmmmm

For almost 10 years i have been reading a magazine called “Australian vVdeo Camera”

I have bought it alsmot every month when it comes out, i love it its does really good bio’s on new cameras and equpment.

It wsa finnally time to get a subscription, jenny emailed off our credit card detials.

we got a reply saying that they are stopping making the magazine.

sad sad news, its the only good magazine of its kind out there on the australian market.

now i’m going to have to move onto some other magazine to get addicted to, maybe ralph or cosmos or dolly or something.