After Oscar had 2 spoons of his dinner and decided that was enough, it was time to take him for a walk to fill in time until bed time.

So off the two of us went, him screaming in the pram and me sweating as I pushed it up the hill.

After 20 mins of him screaming the appeal of wandering the streets on a lovely summerish arvo was diminishing dramatically.  But i had to press on as it was still another 5 mins until we would be home.

It was at this point we went under a tree along the footpath. Going under trees is not normally a blog worthy experience, but today it was.  Whilst passing under the tree a bird decided to defecate all over my face and arms.

I know what you are thinking – how did a bird crap on my face? Was I looking up? No I wasn’t. And the reason I have called this post ‘house bird’ is that the bird must have been the size of a house to release that much carnage from it’s back door. I felt it spray me from the top of my head, all over my face and my arms.

The 5 minute walk home from this point was significantly reduced by my now fast moving legs.

If there is dog poo lurking in grass you can be guaranteed that my shoes will find it. I get poo attacks from below and above and I’m sure Oscar will find ways of covering the horizontal region too.

aaaaarrggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!