Last night David and Andreana had their kissing party (engagement gathering) in some suburb of Melbourne that had a ‘m’ and ‘v’ in it’s name. Having been invited to this party Tom and I decided to attend.
Because we enjoy our independence and want to squish any notion that we are the same person we decided not to travel together on the same plane, but instead to travel on different planes at around the same time.
I got on a train yesterday morning that was also on Tom’s train line. As the train pulled into his station I didn’t see him,which I thought was odd as we had planned to travel at least to the airport together.
The doors where about to close when tom emerged from the station stairs ,and he hadn’t got his ticket yet, so he missed the train. I got off at the next top and waited for him on the next train.
Turns out he missed the train because he fell up the stairs.
We arrived at the Airport and tom went off to his plane and I went off to mine.
My plane was massive!!!
After arriving in Melbourne we got the skybus into the city and walked around for a bit. We didn’t want to arrive on time to the party because we didn’t know many people and also because we are pretty rock ‘n roll!
We found a dingy food court in the bottom of some building, and decided to get some lunch. I went to the counter of one of the food outlets and said “Can I please have some hot chips and 2 potato cakes?” to which the lady replied “No, you don’t want that, I get you something special, just give me 30 seconds”
She then disappeared out the back, and I decided that whatever it was she was getting I didn’t want it as I had already asked for what I wanted.
She reemerged with a Styrofoam bowl filled with what looked like fish market floor scrapings. To make it look gourmet she put some green stuff on top and put it on the counter and told me I would love it, ‘you want this, you love it”
I declined her offer to which she said “Ok I serve someone else and come back to you”
Most people would probably walk away at this stage, but none of the other outlets looked appealing so I decided to give this one more chance.
I managed to get a toasted avocado, cheese and tomato sandwich which was fine.
After lunch we wandered to flinders street station to get a tram to the party. Along the way we walked past a nightride stop, which had the below mode of transport parked in it.
I can’t picture 15 drunk young people cramming into a stage coach at 3am stinking of kebabs and singing ‘working class man’ loudly, but it must happen. I much prefer the buses they provide in Sydney.
We got some tickets, then waited for our tram.
At the party using our amazing party skills we spent almost the whole party in the one room, and in one corner of that room. I know this is probably a surprise to lot of you.
We did venture out into the kitchen for a while to talk with TEAR people’s but after a while it was back to the room.
At one stage I really needed to wee, so I went to the toilet, which was a scary experience, it was a sliding door right next to the toilet with no lock and you don’t have to go back to far in my blog archives to see how i feel about bathroom doors with no lock.
Anyway the main problem was that when i went in I discovered quite a lot of wee on the toilet seat and i knew there was people outside the toilet waiting to use it after me, so to avoid them thinking it was me I had to clean it up.
So I cleanded it up and whoever was after me probably thought “wow what a clean toilet”
Towards the end of the party Tom and I started to shine a bit more, there was a lot less people and we where both probably tired so the rude jokes started flowing, mostly amusing others in the room.We tried looking up dirty words in a synonyms book, that right we are PARTY ANIMALS, but the book was crap it didn’t even have ‘breast or ‘penis’.
After the party we headed back to David’s new residence, which I have to say in just under a week he has done an amazing job at making it feel like a ‘david environment’ he will argue it’s because he is still unpacking.
We ate chips, drank coke and watched a movie.
And that was Saturday.
Sunday I got up at 9:30am!!!!!! It was amazing, i haven’t got to stay in bed that late for ages.
We all headed into the city for some breakfast in one of Melbourne’s famous laneways at a little cafe. Luckily we where sitting inside, if you sit outside you run the risk of your food being knocked off the table by some crazy lady wearing a curtain pushing a giant ball of wool down the lane.
A trip to JB, a walk past an apartment on sticks and it was time to say goodbye to David.
The time in Melbourne was so bonding that Tom and I caught the same plane home.
