cream of the crop

Let’s be honest. Sometimes parenting sucks.

It’s not all ‘Such a privilege’ or ‘so beautiful’.

Sometimes it’s bollocks.

This afternoon it was bollocks.

I think Oscar is the only person in the world so far to work out how to frustrate me to a point of no return. Now it should be noted that my version of frustrated is a lot different to other peoples. The frustration / anger part of me is pretty small and weak.

My version of extreme frustration is normally executed through things like a non specific ‘grrrrr’ tweet or some muttering followed by me withdrawing from whatever it is.

But sometimes Oscar gets me to a point where I want to angry tweet, mutter LOUDLY and even shout out “OSCAR WHY DID YOU DO THAT, I’M VERY CROSS”

Today I tweeted

Screen Shot 2013-04-16 at 5.51.19 PM

I said things like ‘grrrrrrrrrr’ and ‘what the hell”

and I shouted at Oscar.

Then I left the room to calm down.

I called Jenny, I calmed down while the phone was still ringing, we worked out some consequences of Oscar’s actions and I went back in and Oscar and I spent a long time cleaning.

Every day that we are home Oscar has a ‘rest time’.

Time in his room where he can play quietly or look at books and if hell freezes over maybe even nap.

Rest time ended today and I went in to his room to say Hi and help him tidy thing away so we could get on with the day.

First thing I notice was all his drawers open, then I pan the room to discover his window looks all blurry, a bit like frosted glass. I’m pretty sure he had normal windows an hour ago.


It is then I discover a tub of his eczema cream on the floor.

I asked Oscar what happened to his window.

“Well an ant came in my window and picked up the cream and walked all over my windows”

What really happened Oscar?

“well it really was the ant”

the frustration is probably up to me knees at this point.

I asked Oscar not to lie and tell me the truth, he said he didn’t know what happened.

This went on for a while, at the same time I noticed more and more things in his room covered in cream, I also notice more tubs and tubes of eczema creams placed around his room.




Tops of shelves, floor tiles, light switch, door handles, toys, drink bottle all covered in cream

Eventually he owned up to doing it, I guess the Ant knew Oscar’s weakness and figured he would own up sometime, bloody Ant!!!!!

We spent a lot of time cleaning things and discovering more things covered.

He used the following creams in case you are wondering


I took all his toy cars out of his room and also told him no tv, videos etc for a few days.

Normally when we take things away he explodes and the whole world falls apart. Which I guess in a way is what we want as it’s a result of him doing something wring there is consequences that affect him.

not today damn it.

His response was

“that’s fine daddy, I don’t need toys and videos. Now I won’t get distracted in rest time”


PS. If you know someone with sensitive skin I’m charging by the hour to come and roll around in Oscar’s room. No socks though, the floor is way too slippery.




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