The Poo Party
By Kylie Orr
You are a big kid now
Learning to poo
On the potty, the big toilet
Or some call it a LooI have a special secret to share
It’s about a great party
Everyone’s poo will be there.You see, when you do poo on the loo
It goes down a slide, yelling “woohoo!”And under the house is where the poo meets
Mum’s poo, Dad’s poo and even brother, Pete’s!They all get together, play games and sing songs
There’s hats and balloons and before long
Another poo comes sliding down the S-bend
To join in the fun with all of its friends.But this tale has another side
Some poo will miss out on the ride.
If you do poo in your pants
That poo won’t get a chance
To dance at the poo party under the houseThere’ll be no fun with all the other poos
It will be sad and lost and won’t know what to do.So next time you feel the need
When there’s poos coming
Or maybe just wees,
Think of your poo and where it should go
In your pants? Or down the loo and below?
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email Howie & Tom [Live] from the bathroom
Oscar says things that make me happy.
After some noisy farts (that he did).
‘Was that thunder?”
Putting him to bed tonight.
Me – “Can I have some goodnight kisses?”
Oscar – “Oh I have to do a pretend fart first”
1 ply comedy returns
you can watch it live here, put it in your calender so you remember.
Ice up yours
Coke has these new coke machines where you buy a bottle, take a sip then turn the bottle up side down, when you turn it upside down the coke begins to freeze. You then turn it thr right way up and drink super chilled coke.
Here is their official video.
I looked up to see if there was any ‘ice up’ machines near home and there is!!! So Off we went.
I bought the bottle.
pressed the button and out came my coke.
Lachy who was with us and also got one for himself.
Lachy opened his and it worked first go, he took a sip, put the lid back on then turned it upside down and it began to freeze.
I opened my lid, it exploded all over my hand and the table.
I turned it upside down and it did begin to freeze but it also exploded more every time I attempted to open it.
Eventually I was able to drink it and I have to say I really liked it!!!!
Sure it’s just coke with ice in it but it’s beautiful.
dollar for dollar for africa
This is good news, the current food crisis in Africa has put 13 million people at risk of malnourishment and to fuel the crisis an outbreak of cholera and measles is spreading across the horn.
This is not a matter of us chucking $2 into a bucket, we need to dig deep and give as much as we can so that those on working on the ground can deliver nutritious meals, access to clean water and improved sanitation conditions. If our Government is willing to match our giving lets give big!!!!!!!
donations through the following organisations will be matched by the Australian government up until November 30.
- Act for Peace
- ADRA Australia
- Anglican Board of Mission Australia
- Anglicord
- Australian Lutheran World Service
- Australian Red Cross
- Baptist World Aid Australia
- CARE Australia
- Caritas Australia
- CBM Australia
- ChildFund Australia
- Oxfam Australia
- Plan International Australia
- Save the Children Australia
- TEAR Australia
- UnitingWorld
- World Vision Australia
goodnight.
I went to Black Stump,
It rained,
I got to use a radio,
I am tired,
It was super.
Apple Strudel
After almost 12 months in the Apple recruitment process and it ending with me not getting a job I was still excited about the Hornsby Apple Store opening today.
During the past year I had 5 interviews and months of waiting in between to finally be told I was not going to get a job but that I could apply again in a few months if I wanted to. I didn’t want to.
Hornsby Store the day before opening
Anyway the hornsby store opened at 10am this morning, I knew it would be busy and dumb to go at 10 and also as a protest to them not employing me I waited until 11am. It was super busy when we walked past and security had set up barricades to control the long line of people waiting to get into the store. The first 1000 people in to the store get a free apple shirt.
I am not kidding when I tell you that I was the 1001th person to enter the store.
Bloody Apple, I love your products but you sure don’t love me.
sad face
Me – ‘Hey Oscar is mummy the best mummy?’
Oscar – ‘Yes and I’m the best Oscar’
Jenny – ‘Is daddy the best daddy?’
Oscar – *silence
Jenny – ‘Who is the best daddy?’
Oscar – ‘no one.’
still thinking but…
I think I agree with almost everything in this article.
Legalise gay marriage, what’s the harm?
turtle compound, blood and a solar shower
Yesterday I did some things.
We are supposed to take our turtles out in the real sunlight a few times a week, they have UV lights above their tank but real sun is better. We are pretty slack at doing it becasue it’s a bit of effort and the little buggers are really fast so we can’t just let them roam the front yard.
They used to have a nice little set up but they worked out how to climb over the fence.
So I decided to build something a little more substantial.
I’m not a perfectionist when it comes to handyman stuff, which is good because I’m not very good at it. I kind of just make it all up as I go and try to avoid using things like tape measures and accuracy. This time the end result is not too shabby.
Although I did manage to squeeze my finger in some pliers resulting in a massive blood blister which a few minutes later I accidentally ripped open with a screwdriver.
It really hurt, and still does.
Plus I have blood all over one of my screwdrivers.
Anyway eventually I finished it.
One of the other things I did yesterday was use a camp solar shower. Our hot water is heated by a natural gas ‘instant hot water’ system which is quite energy efficient, but it still does require the burning of the gas. I got a solar camp shower the other day for a ridiculously cheap price so wanted to test it out. I filled the bag with water, left it in the sun for a few hours then took it inside for a shower.
The water was warm, the flow was quite weak but I was able to have a shower and clean myself. I’m not planning on using it every day but I reckon in summer it won’t be hard to use it at all and I can shower happily knowing I’m using much less water and no dodgy fuel.
I’m pretty much captain planet.
Today the turtles used their new outdoor digs, I’m pretty sure they liked it although they never talk to me anymore.
5 years
Today marks 5 years of marriage to my favourite wife.
When we were first married we often used to say to each other how being married wasn’t all that different to being best buddies onnly now Jenny didn’t have to drop me home at the end of each day. Thankfully that is still the case, we have no desire to live in separate houses.
Being married is pretty fun, and I think we do an allright job at it. We laugh a lot, we don’t really fight. Well he have disagreements and sometimes our rage at each other gets soo intense that it can be up to 30 seconds after something angry making has happened for one of us to offer the other one a drink or make some witty comment.
I guess everyone does conflict differently we aren’t very good at it and don’t really want to learn.
Most of all we are buddies, we enjoy hanging out just as much as we did in the flirting days. Simple things make us happy like jenny bringing me home a bottle of coke or me remembering to bring the washing in. (both of these are rare occurrences, which is why they are so special when they do happen).
Jenny I love you and stuff.
5th Anniversary’s are ‘wood’ . you know like how others are paper, and gold and stuff. I’m not sure when the itunes one is but I’m excited about that one when it comes.
To fit with the wooden theme I made Jenny a little gift.
I got a bit of wood from under the house (thanks Keith). Carved out a little bit, got a plaque made, stained the wood and stuck the plaque in the hole I made.
She better like it because I hurt my finger pretty bad making the damn thing. Not in a masculine way like ripping off a fingernail with a chisel or something. No I hurt it by getting it jammed in a hinge on my folding work bench when setting it up.
